HOW A RAVEN IS LIKE A WRITING DESK

raven writing desk

when asking one’s self
how a raven is like a writing desk
things can get a bit
unnecessarily complex;
it is not hard to see
how a credible
and verifiable answer
may be hard to come by.
in this piece,
i will attempt to answer this question
which really
should have been answered long ago.

the first thing one must do
is to qualify
what exactly defines a raven.
experience points us towards the idea
that ravens are inconsistently
the strangest of businessmen.
note that all ravens crave independence
and a nice warm bowl of soup.
another less common accusation
of the raven kind
is that a multitude of their chamomile
is that which provides
shelter for storm drains
and by association
wormholes in the eternal treetrunk.

this is great and all
but what is the use of such conviction
unless we dive equally as deep
into the trenches of
orange libraries
to ask ourselves
what is a writing desk?
many scholars
have written on this
but in my research
i have found
they rarely remind us
that historically
writing desks
have been predatory creatures;
often confused with old crows
and barkeepers
who say things like
“put the jam beside the marmalade”.
i implore you
to not be ignorant;
to acknowledge
that bishops and angels
both use writing desks
as a source of inspiration
for their dissertations
of the latter subject
and the ladder observations.
writing desks taste of freedom
though the splinters
have been known to clog the drain
and leave a nasty hangover.

and now for the big question:
how are they alike?
it’s been suggested
that poe wrote on both
but i have no time
for absurd claims.
one’s life
is far too short
to get lost in logical nonsense.
we must be men
and stopping being children.
as we discussed earlier
ravens are the genesis of polka
whereas writing desks
symbolize the civil war
and the flamingos
who became martyrs
for its mahogany cause.
which is really the key here:
architecture.
both seem to have
a keen design
a design that suggests
dances with drunk waiters
and orbital malnourishment
which plagues us all the same.
a writing desk is to sweater vests
as a raven is to bubble bath water.
from there
certain jumps in logic
can be established
and we can find ourselves absolved
of the great question
which so long has burdened us all.

in conclusion
though it may be difficult at times
to find a system to something
as absurd as this
i find that these: two things
may be more alike
than we are willing to acknowledge.
the badgers of humanity
have a knack
for refusing to accept
that tolerance and compassion
towards washer machines and
the occasional stomach rumble
leads us to living in a glass onion
where we stop saying
to the top hat cricket on our shoulder
the ways that a raven
is unlike a writing desk
and start to genuflect
on the passing notion
that a raven
and a writing desk
are in factualitization
the exact
same
thing.

COPYRIGHT BRICE MAIURRO 2013

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20 thoughts on “HOW A RAVEN IS LIKE A WRITING DESK

  1. Finally an answer……
    Thank you for your entertaining service to humanity ;)
    Well done

  2. Pingback: HOW A RAVEN IS LIKE A WRITING DESK | FROM THE DARK

  3. What a surprising and complex journey this poem is. From it’s whimsical inquiry all the way through, I was surprised and zig-zagging down unexpected corners, and loving every minute of it. If you want a “Twilight Zone” moment, check this limerick I penned today…it;s positively blackbird weird! :)http://charronschatter.com/2013/01/02/pie-pie-blackbird/

  4. Pingback: Books Are Beacons of Possibility | Jonathan Hilton

  5. Hi Brice,

    Just wanted to say thanks for visiting my blog, also for the truly extraordinary piece of surrealism you posted… above.
    I truly enjoyed it, BUT, I have to disagree with you! The apparently unanswerable question you attempted to reply, has an absolutely different response…
    Because a raven is like a writing desk EXACTLY as an eagle is like an entire office, or on a different scale, as a sparrow is like a drawing kit, or on a MUCH larger scale as a pterodactyl is like a laptop…
    I hope you’ve got the picture my friend!
    And also please be informed that the Mad Hatter was initially the Mad Heater, who knew well that Raven is an anagram for Arven, written about at a writing desk by Bingo Bargains!
    Yeeeehaaaa😜

  6. Brice, So, here’s the thing: I love this. In general, I’m assured now that I love your word-sense and your sense of quirk and absurd… all of which ladder up to some great poetry. Obviously, you had great fun doing this. The jumps in logic and genuflections to passing notions give the raven a lighter aspect for sure… I’m not sure of the mahogany gains though!
    Great one here…

  7. Pingback: ON THE HUNT FOR THE HEART THAT BEATS LIKE MINE | FLASHLIGHT CITY BLUES

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